I've sat with this post for a few months. But here it is...
Am I going to regret this post in the morning? Probably not.
Here in New Zealand, and in most other countries (I'm guessing), there is an alarming number of children living with abuse, neglect and poverty. New Zealand has a very bad reputation when it comes to death of young children due to abuse.
Daily, we are confronted with news articles about children who are hungry. Children who have been horribly abused. Children who have died because of terrible abuse.
We are faced with the failing of families and the destruction of childhoods. There is the eternal saga of benefits vs working for the money.
The "who is being punished" if you were to stop the benefit argument has been had ad nauseum. The government is trying to stop the abuse of the benefit and the children.
I actually can't read any more of the articles. It is always the same arguments from all sides. The same excuses. The same blame-game.
In my honest opinion (this is what's going to get me drawn and quartered) the biggest thing people are forgetting is that pro-creating is not a right any more. It is a privilege. If you are unable to feed yourself, whether or not you are relying on government handouts, you should not have a child. If you fall on hard times, do not have another child until you are back on your feet. You are responsible for your child(ren) not Joe Blogg who is a hard working father of one who would love to have another child but can't afford it.
It is your responsibility to look after that child. Clothe her, feed him, love her, educate him. Do not blame your circumstances on others. It is our choices that keep us where we are and take us to new things.
agree 100%! and it pisses me off when you make a complaint to cyfs and tell them everything you know, and they decide they are going to do nothing. happens way too often!
ReplyDeleteI can so understand that frustration. It's very sad.
DeleteNo arguments here!
ReplyDeleteMakes total sense!
ReplyDeletearrgh.. I just commented, and it just disappeared ... into cyberspace, (and it was a long-ish comment too...)... I will try and paraphrase, so I don't have to type it all out again.
ReplyDeleteTOTALLY agree with you 100%.
I am sick to death of beneficiaries with more than 5 kids, complaining that they can't give their kids this or that because the government is ripping them off, and that we are "so lucky" that our kids have new things..bikes/clothes etc... MY HUSBAND WORKS DARN HARD FOR THOSE THINGS!! AND ON TOP OF THAT WE ARE PAYING A MORTGAGE, AND GET NOT 1 CENT FROM THE GOVERNMENT AND WE DECIDED TO STOP AT 2 KIDS.......!! (and I get this often from people I KNOW quite well!). Oh, and FYI... one of the "said people" is currently pregnant with her TENTH baby... I mean I'm not being a cow and saying you can only have so many kids.. NO..like you I'm saying people need to be realistic about how many kids they can provide for!!! (and not just via a benefit!). (YES I SAID 10TH CHILD!).
*SIGH* I will shut up now! ;)
......I re-read this and it sounds like I'm grumpy at ALL Beneficiaries... I am not! Just the ones who go on and on and like to moan about things, and how hard they have got it........ hope that clarifies and stops the hate-mail ;)
DeleteDamn Cyberspace Gremlins stealing your comment!
DeleteI am with you on your 5+ kids rant. I can understand a first child being a bit of a shock when it comes to finances but then surely you learn from that?
TEN children is ridiculous! UNLESS you have a very highly paid spouse... 10?!?!?!
And I also think that the benefit is there for those who need help, but if you are going to bitch and moan about how hard your life is in comparison to people who work hard and do the best they can with what they get, then suck it up and start fending for yourself...
Yep TEN kids!!! and no... as far as I'm aware...not very highly paid at all......10..
DeleteAgree 100%. I want to live in a society that looks after it's needy but am sick of supporting what has become a lifestyle choice for many, many people. There are no easy answers and as long as beneficiaries get to vote there may never be a solution (vested interests). Ohhh, how's that for stirring up a hornets nest?
ReplyDeleteKeep stirring :)
DeleteI understand what you mean. It's one of those situations where you can't really change anything without disadvantaging someone...
Yep - but then you have to change the system. Currently it pays money to have a child if you're on the benefit here in NZ!!
ReplyDeleteSigh.... as it does in the UK. I wonder if it will change here now that they are encouraging more parental responsibility?
DeleteI absolutely absolutely agree with you. For me it sometimes seems that with the limits of the benefit and things it would almost seem as if people are "rewarded" for the less they earn and the more kids they have.
ReplyDelete+ 10 internetz to the lady with the stainless-steel pair for saying what needs to be said. It seems that and debate on this subject gets flamed as a slippery slope to eugenics or benefit bashing neither of which is true.
ReplyDeleteI would genuinely like to see the introduction of a "parenting licence", suitably renamed for these politically correct times in which prospective parents are given the practical and emotional tools necessary to have children. Anyone with such a qualification would be entitled to a higher child benefit or some other tangible reward. I think it is a step too far to the right, even for me, to presume that you would not be allowed to breed without a licence... but we can dream :)
Hey Antz,
DeleteI am honored you have commented :D Hope you are enjoying your sabbatical.
A licence is the way to go!! I think teen parents can get more support financially if they go to parenting classes so why not get $10, or an hour of childcare, extra a week if an older parent does a course?
LJx
A "parenting licence" is a fantastic idea!! .........
DeleteI am often conflicted by the notion that one must have a licence to keep dogs and yet it's a free-for-all when it comes to being able to have kids. What also riles me up is the fact that the government - and it doesn't even matter which party any more since "center" tends toward "center-left" policies in this country - appears to be rewarding families who have no money and have copious numbers of children. Why? Well, why not? You get more money for each child until the age of 16 when they can also start collecting their own handout. Hell, on top of that you are entitled to all sorts of supplementary benefits because, poor You, you have to cope with so many children! (Oh, pity you don't have any money left over to clothe and feed them since you've got to make yourself feel better about your situation by traipsing down to the local TAB and spending your last $10 on cigarettes.)
DeleteIt's a cycle that is so enticing for people who are not particularly motivated to do anything anyway, because a) they don't know any different, b) who have they got as role models?, and c) are they really going to get off their arse every day to go do a job that pays just about as much as what they currently get as a handout and they don't have to lift a damn finger (unless it's to roll their next "cigarette" or slap a kid around for crying because they are hungry)?!?
Our society is a sick one because we allow this to happen, but to change it may mean some pretty tough consequences for decision makers. I can get on my soap box and start espousing all of my ideas, but in the end there will always be good reasons why my brilliant solutions will have many holes.